"On the Greens"
Lincoln Valley Golf Course
Submitted by Jeff Barry
Monday, August 24, 2009
News at the Course:
The deadline for purchasing one of the lifetime
memberships is 4:00 on Sunday, September 27. That afternoon at 2:00 is
the annual meeting in the banquet hall. If you remember, there are five
nontransferable memberships available for $15,000 and five for $25,000 that may
be transferred one time. A commitment of $500 must be made that day with
the membership paid in full by January 15, 2010. Of course a person may
pay in full that day if able. If these memberships are paid through the
State Center Development Association, they will be tax deductible. If you
have questions, call one of the board members or Mike Eckhardt.
Dates to Remember:
Aug. 30
Animal Rescue League Outing
Sept. 3
Men's League Banquet
Sept. 4
Couples Night - 6:00
Sept. 5 W.M.
Booster Glow Ball Outing
Sept. 8 Ladies
Fall Banquet
Sept.
13 4-Man Best Shot Open - 1:00
Shotgun for the Guys
Sept.
14
Mid-Iowa Seniors Open - 8:00 Shotgun
Sept.
16
New Board's First Meeting - 6:00 in
Banquet Hall
Sept.
18
Last Couples Night - 6:00
Sept. 19
Woodrow's First Annual Golf Outing
Sept. 20
Wilkening Reunion Golf Outing - 9
Holes at 9:00
Sept.
26 2-Couple Best Shot 9:00
Sept.
27
Annual Membership Meeting - 2:00 in
the Banquet Hall
ACTUAL CALLS RECEIVED AT THE PUBLIC GOLF COURSE
Staff: Golf course, may I
help you?
Caller: What are your green fees?
Staff: 38 dollars.
Caller: Does that include golf?
Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, I need to get some information from
you. First, is this your correct phone
number?
Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, we have a tee time for two weeks
from Friday. What's the weather going to
be like that day?
Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, I had a tee time for this afternoon
but I'm running late. Can you still get me
out early?
Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, do you have one of those areas where you
can buy a bucket of golf balls
and hit them for practice?
Staff: You mean a driving range?
Caller: No, that's not it..,,,
Staff: Golf course, may I help you?
Caller: Yes, I'd like to get a tee time tomorrow
between 12 o'clock and noon.
Staff: Between 12 o'clock and noon?
Caller: Yes.
Staff: We'll try to squeeze you in.
______________________________
Church Jokes
An elderly woman died last month. Having never married, she requested
no male pallbearers. In her handwritten instructions for her memorial service,
she wrote, "They wouldn't take me out while I was alive, so I don't want
them to take me out when I'm dead."
A police recruit was asked during the exam, "What would you do if you had
to arrest your own mother?" He answered, "Call for backup."
A Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph and Mary took Jesus with
them to Jerusalem . A small child replied, "They couldn't get a
baby-sitter."
______________________________
Contacts, Memberships, Phone Numbers:
Lincoln Valley Golf Course: 483-2054
Our Website: http://lincolnvalleygolf.com/
Aaron Cluver, Clubhouse Manager: 515-988-5483
Dustin Eggers, Superintendent: 641-351-9208
Board Members: Jeff Barry, President, Dallas Pfantz, Vice-President,
Nancy Figgins, Secretary, Gary Underwood, Treasurer, Joe McGuire, Justin Edler,
Pat Howe, Duane Davis, and Claudie McClain
Parting Putt:
Now that school has started, I have been a little too busy to get out on the
greens. I hope to soon, though, since fall is coming, and that is one of
my favorite times of the year to golf. No, it is not because I always
keep my drives in the fairways away from the falling leaves, but it is because of
the changing colors of the leaves that makes for a fantastic scenery. I
hope you and yours get out to L.V. and enjoy it, too!
--
Jeff
Barry