"On the Greens"
Lincoln Valley Golf Course
Submitted by Jeff Barry
September 19, 2008

News at the Course:
   As you know by now, Lincoln Valley's 30th is this weekend.  If you have not signed up for the two-couple, alternate-shot golf tournament, you need to call the clubhouse.  That starts at 1:00.  An excellent meal will be served starting at 5:00 for only $5.  Then, there will be entertainment and dancing from 7:00 on into the night.  It's time to celebrate!

Dates to Remember:
September 27:    30 -Year Anniversary Celebration
September 28:   Premier 3-Person Golf Outing  -  9:00 Shotgun

October 11:     Men's Association Chili Dipper and Chili Cook-off Outing - 10:00

October 19:     Annual Membership Meeting - 2:00 in Banquet Hall

                        ______________________________
 Questions that haunt me . . .

* Can you cry under water?

* How important does a person have to be before he/she is considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

* Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. But it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

* Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

* Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

* What disease did cured ham actually have?

* How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

* Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
                        _______________________________

Contacts, Memberships, Phone Numbers:
Lincoln Valley Golf Course:  483-2054
Nick Grossman, Board President:  751-4013
Aaron Cluver, Clubhouse Manager:  515-988-5483
Dustin Eggers, Superintendent:  641-351-9208
Our "Really Great" Web Site is lincolnvalleygolf.com

Parting Shot:
  Marriage is a  relationship in which one person is always right, and the other is usually the  husband...

-- 

Jeff Barry