"On the Greens"
Lincoln Valley Golf Course
Submitted by Jeff Barry
September 26, 2008

News at the Course:
Much thanks to all who helped make Lincoln Valley's 30th Anniversary a huge success.  The weather cooperated, and it was a great day.  Thanks to the committee of ladies who worked so hard setting up the plans and carrying them through, and thank you to the staff for doing an excellent job.  The pork was excellent, too, Pat Hageman, and it was donated.  Thank you so much!  We are blessed to have such an awesome facility right here in our community.
    One more thanks goes to Jim Figgins for doing an excellent job updating the Lifetime Membership list and making a really nice plaque for display.  Awesome, my friend!

Dates to Remember:
October 11:           Men's Association Chili Dipper and Chili Cook-off Outing - 10:00
October 19:             Annual Membership Meeting - 2:00 in Banquet Hall
                        ______________________________
A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day, only to be confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.

"Good morning," said the young man. "If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners."

"Go away!" said the old lady.  "I'm broke and haven't got any money!"  And she proceeded to close the door.

Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it wide open. "Don't be too hasty!" he said.  "Not until you have at least seen my demonstration."

And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet.

"If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder."

The old lady stepped back and said,

"Well, let me get you a fork, 'cause they cut off my electricity this morning."
                   _______________________________

Contacts, Memberships, Phone Numbers:
Lincoln Valley Golf Course:  483-2054
Nick Grossman, Board President:  751-4013
Aaron Cluver, Clubhouse Manager:  515-988-5483
Dustin Eggers, Superintendent:  641-351-9208
Our "Really Great" Web Site is lincolnvalleygolf.com

Parting Shot:
To celebrate Lincoln Valley's 30th Anniversary each membership (not each individual member) will be given an insulated beverage tumbler, paid for entirely through the generosity of business sponsors.  Pick yours up at the annual meeting on October 19 or at the clubhouse before November 1. Be sure to thank the sponsors and patronize their businesses.

-- 

Jeff Barry